• Free Book Summaries: Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone Bruce Patton Sheila Heen
  • Book Review: Difficult Conversations
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Amazon Price: $17.00 $13.60 You save: $3.40 (20%). (as of November 24, 2017 2:04 am – Details). Product prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on the Amazon site at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.

We attempt or avoid difficult conversations every day-whether dealing with an underperforming employee, disagreeing with a spouse, or negotiating with a client. From the Harvard Negotiation Project, the organization that brought you Getting to Yes, Difficult Conversations provides a step-by-step approach to having those tough conversations with less stress and more success. you'll learn how to:

• Decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation
• Start a conversation without defensiveness
• Listen for the meaning of what is not said
• Stay balanced in the face of attacks and accusations
• Move from emotion to productive problem solving

Product Details

  • Paperback: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Penguin Books; 10 Anv Upd edition (November 2, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0143118447
  • ISBN-13: 978-0143118442
  • Product Dimensions: 5 x 0.7 x 7.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces

Customer Reviews

Help using my anger more productively and peacefully!

48 helpful votes
 on July 17, 2016
For several years I’ve been working in psychotherapy to actually feel my anger – and use it productively so that people don’t walk all over me. I used to be such a people-pleaser, i didn’t even know when I was angry… and then I would unknowingly turn all my anger on myself – in the form of depression and self-criticism. It can still take awhile for me to realize when I don’t like something and am annoyed or frustrated. And when I get angry, I can still become very anxious so it’s tempting to vent, thinking I’m so entitled and right. But venting always turns out bad. Now I’m committed to becoming aware when I don’t like something – sooner and sooner – and setting boundary or at least expressing what I don’t like. Enter this book. It is helping me do all the is MUCH more gracefully. At first I just wanted to set a boundary. Sometimes it came out harsh. Now I understand the importance of staying calm, compassionate and connected with the other person when expressing my likes and dislikes as well as when negotiating and compromising – and staying friends during the whole process! I’m still learning. And reading the book. I’m not depressed anymore. Really. It’s really great.

Life changer, recommend without hesitation.

1 helpful vote
 on February 25, 2016
By Jye Yau Wong
It must be one of the most important books I read in my life. Douglas Stone’s difficult conversation not only help me have many meaningful and important conversations in my life, it also helped me to learn about my identify, my emotions and under how my past has an effect on my present and what I should do to change my future. I highly recommend this book to everyone who can read.

A seminal book on reframing.

 on October 28, 2017
By Alexandros K.
A seminal book on reframing. Importance of “EQ” and assertiveness should perhaps also be included. -Alexandros Kourt, author of The Curiosity Gene.

Great book!

 on November 11, 2017
By BeeButterflyLover
Written very well, easy to understand and points are right on topic when you have difficult things to talk about.

Insightful and Practical

 on July 26, 2016
By Daversatile
I read Getting to Yes over a decade ago and benefited from those ideas and strategies. I find this book even more psychologically and practically enlightening. The approaches advocated complement similar ideas I’ve learned and (sometimes!) practice from Non-Violent Communication (NVC) and How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. I enjoyed the authors candor and acknowledgement that however useful these ideas may be, the real game isn’t perfect, but certainly worth it.

Five Stars

 on March 26, 2017
By Naomi P
One of the most helpful books ever to support people interested in mastering the art of easing difficult conversations.

Worth your time!

7 helpful votes
 on May 23, 2007
By Steve
This book is worth your time. It will not solve all your problems though. There are some people who are set making a career out of being an A-hole. I got the book on CD’s and listened to it about 5 times. The book teaches techniques in listening and speaking that one can use to disarm and reassure those around you. The effects I’ve experienced with “difficult people” are impressive. Even jerks will be caught off-guard for a while – you may not be able to get through every situation, but it’s comforting that you have certainly given it your “best shot”. This book shows how.

Learned alot and will keep the book for review.

 on October 21, 2017
By Amazon Customer
Enjoyed the book and shed a number different perspectives that I was totally unaware of when working with anyone. Opened my eyes to think and see situations differently. Bought the book for my leadership group and the book and individuals were very enlightning.

A treasure trove of tools

5 helpful votes
 on February 21, 2014
By Rebecca
Excellent insights with concrete examples and tools for implementation. The “identity” conversation category was a real epiphany for me and immediately helped me to understand a number of issues and dynamics I was experiencing. Super helpful.

Very happy with the ideas in this book so far.

2 helpful votes
 on April 9, 2016
By Amazon Customer
Have only finished about 25% of the book so far, but I’ve already used some of the ways to perceive things differently during difficult conversations. I look forward to the rest of the book.