• Mix, Don't Blend: A Guide To Dating, Engagement, And Remarriage With Children
    Mix, Don’t Blend A Guide to Dating, Engagement, and Remarriage with Children
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What if we could bring families together in a way that promotes individual growth and development, and that allows relationships to form according to the wants and needs of everybody involved? What if we created families not based on the idea that “one size fits all,” but that “all sizes fit”.
MIX, DON'T BLEND presents a radically different model of being blended families. It explains how we got to where we are, how our families work, and what we can do to create mixed families that can work for everybody involved. Your blended—or mixed—family will be healthier and happier as you introduce these personally and clinically tested ideas and strategies. Blended families are really nothing new. What is new are the rigid expectations we’ve had for how such families ought to work. We’ve tried forcing everybody into a model of family that developed about 50 years ago and that fit only a minority of American families even then. It certainly never fit blended families.
We’ve done a lot of damage to our blended families because of these unrealistic expectations. A good many of the divorces that plague our blended families are due to all the misunderstandings, miscues, and missed opportunities which these expectations create.
REVIEWS
“This is ground breaking and immensely helpful especially when you explode the myths of blended families which are killers.” ~ Rev. Howard Milkman, Ph.D., LCPC.
“I wish I had this book when my second husband and I married, creating a family of seven children, ages 6 to 18 at the time, two former spouses, and a complex array of new and former in-laws. This is the GPS for navigating the twisty, unfamiliar streets of life in a blended family. Ken and Tammy’s guidance, drawn from deep experience and decades of helping families, is an essential tool to help everyone in combined families survive, thrive, and enjoy the ride.” ~ Debbie Rissing
“Fascinating and inspiring! Sets the standard for blending families into a home filled with mutual respect and love. I am in awe of their example, and strive to be the kind of stepparents they are on a daily basis. They exemplify what a stepfamily should be.” ~ Suzanna M. Biasi
“It is obvious that the love, patience, and devotion you have always demonstrated in your parenting has made this idea for a book become a reality.” ~ Natalie, the youngest

Product Details

  • Paperback: 196 pages
  • Publisher: A Safe Place Publishing, Wyatt-MacKenzie Imprint (May 1, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1936214113
  • ISBN-13: 978-1936214112
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.4 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces

Customer Reviews

Good Information

One person found this helpful.
 on February 24, 2012
By Kathleen55
Although I bought this book as a gift, I received great feedback from my reciprients. They said the book was very helpful and contained a lot of good information.

Sensible advice

 on August 22, 2013
By Mrs. Mary T. Ross
Sensible advice from a professional who has walked the walk. How to keep expectations in line with a new reality.

Mix, Don’t Blend book

One person found this helpful.
 on June 25, 2010
By Lori Gardner
I have not finished the book, but I do like what I’ve read so far. It was in really great condition and was shipped very quickly. I would definitely do business again with this client.

A definite must-read for anyone involved with "mixing" families in any way.

3 people found this helpful.
 on May 31, 2010
By Christine
As a newly divorced mom of two children, I found Mix, Don’t Blend to be a book filled with very straight-forward, necessary information for anyone trying to navigate the very complex relationships with a former spouse/possible new spouse/biological children/possible step-children. Ken and Tammy Potts opened my eyes with a very important message through their definition of “mixed families” – bringing together ingredients that retain their distinctive identities, while co-existing in a configuration that sometimes looks and feels like some sort of family. The book gave me the tools I had been looking for to help define realistic expectations while contemplating a second marriage, while also helping me strengthen my existing relationship with my ex. In the book you’ll find information on everything from dating and remarriage with children, to dealing with biological children and step children, to relationships with exes and other parents. A definite must-read for anyone involved in “mixing” families.

A book based upon experience

2 people found this helpful.
 on July 28, 2010
By Fred H. Conger
I had the opportunity to be the pastor of the church were Tammy and Ken attended and later were married. I watched them mix together two families, sometimes with pain and disappointment but more often with success and joy. This is a carefully written, well researched book on “blended families” that offers very practical advice on how to accomplish successfuly this very difficult task of mixing together two separate family systems into one new one. It is worth reading, discussing, and applying to the life situation of any mixed family. Fred Conger, United Methodist Pastor.

Different theory

One person found this helpful.
 on July 25, 2011
By Rita Rani
Liked the book overall. Alot of time devoted to theory and developmental stages. Uncertain if their ideas will work in practice for my family.