Parenting From the Inside Out

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Amazon Price: $14.95 (as of September 22, 2018 2:01 pm – Details). Product prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on the Amazon site at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.

How many parents have found themselves thinking: I can't believe I just said to my child the very thing my parents used to say to me! Am I just destined to repeat the mistakes of my parents? In Parenting from the Inside Out, child psychiatrist Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., and early childhood expert Mary Hartzell, M.Ed., explore the extent to which our childhood experiences actually do shape the way we parent. Drawing upon stunning new findings in neurobiology and attachment research, they explain how interpersonal relationships directly impact the development of the brain, and offer parents a step-by-step approach to forming a deeper understanding of their own life stories, which will help them raise compassionate and resilient children.

Born out of a series of parents' workshops that combined Siegel's cutting-edge research on how communication impacts brain development with Hartzell's thirty years of experience as a child-development specialist and parent educator, Parenting from the Inside Out guides parents through creating the necessary foundations for loving and secure relationships with their children.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: TarcherPerigee; Reprint edition (April 26, 2004)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1585422959
  • ISBN-13: 978-1585422951
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.7 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces

Customer Reviews


 on August 30, 2015
By jill k billions
The reviewers that gave this book less than 4-5 stars are exactly the people that need to re read this book. We see the world through the lens of memory and everything in our past influences our behavior. While this is not a ” how to ” manual for solving certain problems step by step with our children, it is a much deeper and longer lasting fix. It helps the reader to self examine and become the kind of parent they want to be instead of the kind of parent that they are programmed to be based on their family history.

A Parenting and Emotional Game-Changer

 on April 23, 2017
By Jamie L.
I do a lot of work in emotional health and trauma recovery and personally this has been THE biggest game changer of my parenting. It was incredibly easy for me to use my emotional health tools to analyze my child but she was still struggling no matter what I did. I ended up going to therapy JUST to figure out how I could mother such a hard kid and my therapist recommended this book. It is quite difficult for me to read and process but I am hopeful that as I process my own childhood trauma that slowly and steadily I can become a safe place for my daughter. Thank you Dr. Siegel.

I loved how this book opened

 on October 2, 2017
By (¬‿¬)
I loved how this book opened. It was about how our childhoods affect how we parent our children. Of course, we all know that, but sometimes we are subconsciously affected in ways we don’t realize. Sometimes, we might actively try to correct our parents’ wrongs without realizing the negative effects of that reaction. This book makes us more mindful of our actions. It’s less of a parenting book (as in how to parent) than a book for understanding ourselves so we can be better parents.

Good background knowledge, not a how to parenting book

 on December 11, 2017
By wendyl
This book sheds light on why we act and react in the way that we do when it comes to relationships with our children. It is a nice guide for putting your own life into perspective so that you can bond more deeply with your child. It has been eye opening for me. It is written in a somewhat text book style at a pretty high reading level. It’s very heavy on the neuroscience, which at times can be a tad bit painstaking to decipher and interpret meaning for folks who don’t have any formal scientific background or experience. It also says that it is not a “how to” book but a “how we” book and that is 100% accurate in my assessment. You won’t necessarily learn how to cope with raising your children, you will gain understanding as to why you tend to cope the way that you do cope. This understanding could be very helpful in helping you raise coherent, emotionally secure children. Since starting this book, my capacity for empathy and understanding for both my son and myself has grown immensely. My bottom line on this book is that it is good background knowledge and especially helpful for people who have a sense of unresolved issues from their own childhood. Wouldn’t recommend this as a first book to reach for if you are struggling with parenting issues however. It’s more for people who are looking for deeper resolution to problematic patterns in their parenting journey and for people who enjoy and appreciate neuroscience.

Very helpful

 on October 16, 2014
By Dani
This book has been extremely helpful for me. I did not read the whole thing because it got a bit too slow about halfway through, but the first half is worth 5 stars. There are a lot of things that happened in my childhood that I would brush off as irrelevant to my life now, but when I really examine them and come to terms with the good & the bad that is when I know I can grow past them and be the parent that I want to be.

great parenting book

 on May 21, 2018
By ~Lisa 😷
My dil had this book on her wish list and I couldn’t refuse. She has been reading it and is really liking how the authors help you parent better based on “Drawing on stunning new findings in neurobiology and attachment research, they explain how interpersonal relationships directly impact the development of the brain, and offer parents a step-by-step approach to forming a deeper understanding of their own life stories, which will help them raise compassionate and resilient children.” quote taken from the authors.

Great explanations

 on June 11, 2016
By Steve Lovell
This book contained great explanations for why we fall into particular patterns and I did enjoy having the references to be able to dive in and study more, but I wanted more “how to” than “why” or “what” answers.

Great book for reflection in your parenting

 on December 27, 2017
By abish
I do marriage and family therapy, and this is a book I recommend to clients often. It is a great guide to understanding how relationships with your parents impact your own parenting. There are brief activities for reflection, which is perfect. This book can get tough to read, which makes sense as Dan Siegel is a brilliant researcher, but is worth it.

Another great Dan Seigal creation

 on June 6, 2016
By painter
I do like Dan Seigal. What a mind he has. He is one of the great minds of today putting together psych and neurology into a coherent explanation of psychological functioning ..This one is especially geared to parents and describes the relationship between parenting and the early childhood residuals of their own childhoods. A bit complex maybe for some parents.

Dan Siegel is brilliant!!

 on July 7, 2017
By BeeSunshine
What a wonderful read. Learn about brain development and effective parenting. Reflect on your own childhood, family systems and childhood conditioning. Work through your childhood so you can be conciously aware.